CNN Special Report: Ohio Dog Behaving Oddly

        This is breaking news via CNN! A dog in Ohio has been reported to be acting strangely! At around ten AM today, the dog, a Pomeranian named Muffin, began to run in circles around trees and cringe at the sight of cats, squirrels, and cars. The dog's owner, who declined to be named, told Wolf Blitzer that she had "Never seen Muffin acting like this since last mon-", but was cut off before she could finish.
        On Anderson Cooper 360, internationally renowned new age mystic Peace Ohwagher stated that the dog was foretelling the end of the world, as the Mayans predicted. However, at one thirty-seven the dog abruptly began acting normally again. Psychics are currently debating what this means. Meanwhile, Wolf Blitzer is rushing to Washington D.C, where someone claims to have seen a moderate Republican. We here at News from Rockettopia are skeptical.